Friday, October 8, 2010

Feeling blue........

I didn't think I'd have much to say on this blog.....seeing as how we have put TTC on hold.......

But I visited an old girlfriend the other day which brought up some mixed emotions I was thrilled to see her......We met up at Target as she was shopping for baby toys and pushing around a shopping cart with a little baby boy .......did I mention that this baby is not hers but actually her sisters who has neglected to care for the child and is basically not worthy of being  a mother. I can't go into the details of explaining the situation but my friend is practically raising this child. UGH......and what's worse is that my friend has PCOS and struggles to get pregnant herself. I can tell how heartbroken she is to not be able to have her own child and to have an irresponsible sister who can. The worst part is that the mother has failed to give the child proper care in the way of regular doctor visits. The child has never had a checkup since leaving the weight checks ,no vaccinations, and just flat out no concern. My friend has reported her sister to CPS but only discovered that they are not willing to act on the situation yet........WHAT THE HELL! Oh I guess that's not the worst part because.........she did drugs and smoked all through her pregnancy and this child is perfectly healthy. How is this possible?

Seeing this beautiful child has made me have the pain all over again. Holding him in my arms made me wonder how any woman could not want to spend every waking moment with their child. I came home and told hubby that when we have a child I won't be able to have my attention towards anything else and that I would probably obsessively stare at our baby all hours of the day.....forget TV, books, and all that other stuff.


  1. I share your frustrations with irresponsible parents and the struggle to conceive. Sometimes I think that you need to have a license to be a parent. Sounds like your friend is an amazing aunt and hopefull will be able to give this child a better life.

    Wishing you all the best

  2. Patrish,

    I look at those ill equipped people who are so called parents and it makes me sick. Like you, I always walk away with my heart hurting and wondering why "those people" when there are so many of us who would make wonderful parents. I'm sorry you experienced this, as it does tug at the heart strings.

    Sending you love and hugs.
    ps Hope that you are moved and home and doing well :)

  3. my best friend's gf has drank and smoked through every pregnancy and done drugs through at least some of them. she has had six children (SIX!!!!!!!!!!!!) one abor.tion and NO PREGNANCY LOSSES OF ANY KIND. only two of them live with her, but she doesn't even give a crap about those two. social services think my friend is a great dad, but that she's terrible.

    and her most recent baby is just over a year old and beautiful and healthy and gorgeous, and she just ignores him completely. in the meantime he prefers me and my husband to his mum.

    it utterly breaks my heart that she regularly says 'take him with you!!!' when we leave. i would take him in a heartbeat. he's a gorgeous child.

    life is so, so unfair. it's not fair.

    i'm sorry for rambling on but i'm always scared to talk about it on my own blog in case she finds it :/

  4. Unfortunetly those situations happen all the time. I know someone who has taken gardianship of this beautiful baby girl (who belonged to a co-worker) at the age of 42 with out having any children of her own because the mother was too into drugs to care. Its terrible.

  5. What a bittersweet time for your friend, to be able to care for this baby, but knowing that her grrr sister may still end up with him. I'm sorry for such a rough time...

  6. It's heartbreaking to hear how many stories there are.....

    What a truly terrible situation there is for so many children.

  7. That is so frustrating. Your friend is wonderful, though, for helping out with him as much as it must hurt.

  8. Oh Patrish....don't even get me started on this! As a teacher in a school with MANY parents like this, I get so angry. I see moms pregnant with #7 and not even taking care of any of them. UGH!! If I let myself think about it too much, it gets me sooooo depressed. How can it be that women who don't deserve to take care of any living thing let alone a child seem to get pregnant so easily? It's not something we are meant to understand I guess. It is something I pray about daily. Praying for you too. I do have faith that our time will come! *((HUGS))

  9. Hi - I just came across your blog. It seems we both had a miscarriage on 5/14/2010 and got married about 2 weeks apart.

    Strange that this whole time, we've been struggling with the same thing. I'm so sorry for all you've been through and if you ever want to talk or just check out my blog, you're more than welcome. My email is and my blog is

  10. Also - I grew up in Seattle. I moved to Iowa in 1997.

    So strange...

  11. thought i would leave ya a comment saying i miss you blogging! hope your going ok! :)



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